Future Negative Fantasy

by Shadowdance

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1.
05:35
2.
05:41
3.
4.
5.
04:46
6.
7.
8.
05:21
9.
10.

credits

released 01 May 2012
Carlos Alvarez - Guitars, Keyboards, Additional Vocals
George Eliassen - Vocals
Jay Horvath - Drums on 1, 5, 6, 7, 8 & 9
Jason Fraticelli - Drums on 2, 3, 4 & 10
Jason Fox - Bass

Guest Performers:

Marco Cudan (Harpia Deiis) - Death Vocals on 2 & 7
Santeri Kallio (Amorphis) - Keyboard Solo on 7
Felix Neumann (Machines & Madness) - 2nd Guitar Solo on 5
Tony Rossini - Guitar Solo on 3

Produced & Mixed by C. Alvarez (Dirty Viking Audio)
www.facebook.com/DirtyVikingAudio
Mastered by Brett Caldas-Lima (Tower Studio)
www.towerstudio.net

Vocals Recorded by Jason Dunkerley & Kevin Prendergast at Drowning Fish Studio
www.facebook.com/drowningfishstudio

Drums Recorded by C. Alvarez & Greg Frey at Graphic Sounds Studio

Guitars, Bass, Keyboards & Additional Vocals Recorded by C. Alvarez at Dirty Viking Audio

All Songs Written & Arranged by C. Alvarez Except:
Track 4 - Alvarez / Fraticelli
Track 6 - Alvarez / Johnson
Track 8 - Alvarez / Difabio

Lyrics: Alvarez / Eliassen

Cover Art Design by Brett Worley

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about

Shadowdance Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Aggressive, melodic, dark & intense. Every song is masterfully imbued with its own personality and flair. No two songs sound alike, yet there is a common stylistic edge that links them. Lyrically, they weave intricate stories based on real life and the hardships that can come with it; stories that anyone can relate to..... ... more

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Track Name: Neon Abyss
So tell me now how does it feel?
Look in the mirror, does it still seem real?
The eyes quite familiar, I can taste my fear
I can taste my fear.
So tell me now is that my voice you hear?
Words are forming but it don’t seem real
So tell me now how does it feel to live
In a moment where moments keep passing you by.

To never know, to never care
I’m stuck in a riddle unaware
I have to insist, we barely exist
Neon Abyss

Don’t tell me now, you want to help me
I’m disappearing, soon I’ll cease to be
So tell me know how does it feel to live
In this moment your life is whats passing you by

To never know, to never care
I’m stuck in a riddle unaware
I have to insist, we barely exist
Neon Abyss
To see my life through burning eyes
This riddle keeps asking me why
I have to insist, we barely exist
Neon Abyss

Thoughts are transcending, a race towards the ending
So dark and quiet, free fall in silence
Embraced by the violence, the hunger that drives us
Now it’s time, fall or fly
One more try or last goodbye
Track Name: Branded
There was a time I’d look at you
Try to climb the wall I’d built
Never was as easy as it seemed
With everything I suffered through
I always did believe in you
Why couldn’t you believe in me?

I now see the face you tried to hide
The ugliness inside
Day by day we slowly died
I never saw what you denied
The misery inside
Every moment shared is done and forgotten
Cast out from your mind (cast aside)

Promise of eternity
No, I wasn’t perfect
But I thought you understood me
Run away, start life anew
A rude awakening of truth
Burned the bridge between us to the ground

You left your mark upon me all those years ago
Seven years of my love wasted, nothing left to show
Stranger I’ve know so long, heartless as a stone
Branded with the pain inside, this frozen heart is now mine to own

Maybe now you see what you thought of me was wrong
I guess it’s too late to change the course you chose
The point of no return for you meant the death of who I was
Realized things are never as they seem
Life lesson, bitter painful pill
Still I question if you ever were who you claimed to be
Or did you lie to me?

You left your mark on me, I’ll never be the same
I’ve gone back home, this wall is twice as high
Looking back, what have I achieved?
It’s too late, too late for me
Track Name: All Or Nothing
Furthest from my mind
Felt it deep inside
A momentary lapse of reason
Grief stricken more than pride

My pride
I tried but you gave it all away

An illusion not real
So helpless to feel
So hard to regain
The moments we steal

Now I’m left to set aside
The feelings I’ve applied
Found a flaw in your devotion
Revealed by the test of time

Of time
I tried but you gave it all away

An illusion not real
So helpless to feel
So hard to regain
The moments we steal

I’m not done with you yet, the games that you played
I’m not done by a long shot, the heartache and trauma revealed
I’m not done with you yet, the games that you played
I’m not done by a long shot, the heartache and trauma revealed

You grin while you bear this charade, this deception
So zealous to piss on my good intentions
So bold and affronting, this naked aggression
And since it’s inception I’ve lost all direction
Track Name: Stare At The Sun
Beauty Divine, my fate set when we met
Couldn’t see who you were
Sightless eyes love had burned
Trust in your words, in my heart light from dark
What a fool I believed
You were the one for me

Blinded by love, blinded by pain
I stared at the sun for too long
Learned I was wrong, learned to move on
I’ve stared at the sun for too long

I can’t see what you see
So tell me again just how perfect I am
Never thought you could be the cause of so much pain
Now here I lie, dead inside
So tell me again what a bastard I am
‘Cause nothing hurt me more
Than when I looked in your eyes and saw you were gone

How could you turn your back on me?
Smash the dream
And reveal all I feel was just fantasy
Light to dark
Reality
Track Name: Balance
No friend to me, sweet enemy
But sure to be the reason why I
Know this place, been here before
I know there’s no one else to blame

Turn it over and over again
It’s still the same, it doesn’t change
The waves, that pull me under

Oh, all seems lost
Where is the strength to go on….

On…It’s killing me
The seemingly endless years that go by
Oh, will I ever be
Given serenity, given the strength to go on

A vacant stare, an empty smile
Color bleeds away in the fading light
Distorted view, no sense of time
Tell me there’s someone else to blame

Is there a reason?
A point to all the hurt, the shame
The guilt, the pain
This day just like the others

Oh, all seems lost
Where is the strength to go on….

Where is the strength to go on?
I want the strength to go on
Where is the strength to go on?
Give me the strength to go on
Track Name: Moonlight Tide
Still alive she cried
To face another day
With all the years gone by
The luster tends to fade
Her pain will not subside
I feel so cold inside
Still alive she cried
To face another day

Its cold out tonight
As she reached for her shelter
Like the hunger inside
So savage it felt to her
Every word spoken yes
Mist it would follow
Her eyes like the windowsill
Sunken and hollow

I know there was a time
When laughter was divine
And kindness seemed to fill the morning days
Like the ebb and flow of a moonlight tide
So like a grain of sand
The grain is washed away

So alone she cried
Spreading deep inside
The silence made its way
Gets stronger every day
The sadness grown in size
Her pain will not subside
So alone she cried
Spreading deep inside

From mother’s womb to earthly tomb
Cradle or the grave
Embraced by life, embraced by death
Cradle or the grave
(embraced by life, embracing death)

Home
So far from home
Please take me home
Through the eyes of a child
Where this pain is denied
To a happier time
Full of dreams and belief that the world could be mine…
Track Name: Walk With Fate
All throughout I'm filled with doubt, how can this all be?
I work real hard to see beyond my uncertainty
I don’t know how I’ll make it now, is this my destiny?
If pushed too hard, a calm resolve, I lose my sanity

I’m in a daze, my life has stayed, I’ve felt disharmony
How can it be I cannot see the forest through the trees?

I’ve fought so hard to understand and realize their dream
To learn their rules, to play their games but I lose my dignity
I hit the wall and lost it all, my grim reality
Ten years gone by, the mists of time reveal what I've achieved

How can it be I could not see the forest through the trees?
Walking with fate, can’t hesitate, it will be as it should be

Walk with fate

My pulse is racing, there is no sound
Search for answers seldom found
Never feeling, so unyielding, mind is reeling
But I know I have no choice as I go in blind
Walking with fate

Walk with fate (Destiny)
Track Name: Suspension
Waiting for an answer
Is there a light?
Holding to the memories that
Claim the days and haunt the nights

Hope is not a virtue
Just wasted time
Drowning in the memories that
Numb us to the truth of life

Too late to change what is
Never wanted you gone
I want more time
(Goddamn my pride)
Never wanted you gone

This can’t be real
Won’t let go without a fight
Just one more chance
To set the wrong back to right
It’s all I ask, and you know that I have to try
Cause I never lied,
I never lied when I said you are
The best part of my life

Nothing lasts forever
No point in asking “Why”
Expectations serve no purpose
Only reinforce the lie
Track Name: One More Taste
Deep inside we had something
It was ours to keep and so much more
There are things in life that aren’t so simple
There are things in life we can’t ignore

Not unlike a thousand times before

There is time for pain
But there is none to forget
There is time to regret
But none to repent

We shared our lives, what is left is no more
Where we failed I tried on good intentions
There are things in life pure and simple I’m sure
There are things in life we can’t ignore

Not unlike a thousand times before

There is time for pain
But there's none to forget
There is time to regret
But none to repent

One more taste

One last kiss, one more taste, one last feel
Of my touch on your face
One last kiss, warm embrace, one last gaze
At the smile upon your face
Track Name: Future Negative Fantasy
I’m moving forward now
Faded burned photograph
Time is fleeting now
Shades of once remembered

What’s the cost of experience?
From my youth, for my innocence?
Day after day it still echoes on and on and on

Words in my head repeating
These thoughts alone defeating
For reasons I don’t dare ask
I’m neither here nor there
If I had the will to grasp
Or choice to make at (it) last
Would good fortune look my way?
For peace or strength to seize the day

What’s the cost of experience?
From my youth, for my innocence?
Day after day it still echoes on and on and on

Lower my voice, raise my head
Save my breath on words that are never said

Grace or hope for salvation
These thoughts, these words
My damnation
One grand desire, singularity
So hear now my swansong
This world is done with me

I’m moving forward now
Day after day it still echoes on
From my youth for my innocence
Day after day it still echoes on